Ten Thousand Buttons

..... there is this phone that I thought was completely impossible for me ever to have in my life.. ever... then yesterday, I get a call from the phone company.. and they say that I can get the phone for a little less.. a little than I imagined it could cost... and I want I really want it... a real iphone... for me... !

.... there are things in my life that are working..I was just thinking about how the all jobs has been doing well, also which is really great, also I have managed to feel better..much better than before.. which is really cool for me!!

.... I am feeling right now... I am feeling good about me.. I am even feeling good about Mr. Angue.. I which is great.. also.. .. I have forgotten my train of thought...

.. am not feeling panicked... I am not feeling panicked about Mr. Angue.. We talked yesterday and he was a little menacing... and as a result I felt a little insecure and meditated and felt better.. and slept... and the house I thought I could live in, is available.. and I have 5 days to make the move.. money is in place, people things.. Ooh ooh ooh... I got that number.. remember hat number that was making me crazy.. I got it this morning.. again... I was quite happy with me...BTW the pay raise I received is legit!!

I finally did it, I finally told Angue that I want out, and it went better than I could have expected,  also there was a dispute about money, that I was handling, I was requested to give back some money, but the person who had given me the money made a point to give me a detailed list of the accounts... so they had to return. :-)... there is this girl in the office who is really awful to me, she goes out of her way to say really mean things to me... yesterday the person who signs her contract requested that she get a pay bump,  the overall boss said "No!!!" he he he he, don't forget he has agreed to increase salaries for  everyone else... but I also note I was happy when I saw that she was going to get an increment, I also felt that it was a good thing and it meant that I would also get the same, I did not get jealous or feel bad, I just got angry when she was mean to me, but I didn't feel bad about her impending increment.. but today!! Woo hoo!!!!

...  I have noticed that 2 people in this office have received salary increments without them asking.  They are just about to receive these huge ass pay hikes and they didn't even ask.  Also there is a guy who has gotten a  job with VERY good money and to be honest I am not sure that he knows... I am figuring ... I might be next!!!! Also I might have received another answer to question... of weight loss... I discovered some time back that I love, to the point of obsession dancing.. when music I love is playing I cannot help but jump up and dance... also I was thinking this lunch time that as with weight loss and exercises I really wanted to get an exercise  that I can do for hours that I love and that I can do without sacrifice and strain.. and I already have it and it came to me... as with that leaving Angue will be the same for me... it will be and it will be  as easy, and it will have all the characteristics that I love .. and finally...

..... in the last 7 days... or soo...  This morning.. I felt no bitterness or anger toward Angue.. I said the words, I forgive you.. and I felt much better about him, but when I considered going back with him, I just felt "No" but still peace .. I finally feel as though I finally have permission to leave and that feels soo good.. I think I stayed so long because I didn't feel worthy .... interesting... I also did some work at lunch time and I am feeling really amazing!!! which is really cool, I even have released some weird feelings toward a be-hated one... I also this morning, something fun happened to me, I was on my way to work and some guy stops next to me and asks me if we work in the same general area, I say "yes", and he offers me a lift, and I say "okay" and away we go.. he turns out  fun, and he tries to get my number... kind of insists, which  I like... but for some reason it doesn't come through... but it is okay.. or at least I will ...

.. Let us start with Friday.. no Thursday.. I was looking for new tyres for my car.. I happened to go on to a site that joins sellers to buyers, and just then I happened on a guy who is selling tyres, and he is offering  tyres for less than half of what I got them before!! It is a very good deal!!  Then on Friday I had the privilege to take part in a very good training for trainers.. something I have been wanting to do for the longest time..  (the 2nd one) then I got to my car to go home, and I had  a flat!! so I removed the things and I just sat there, not really knowing what to do.. I even cried a little. I tried to call people who could help me and no one was able or available... and then this guy out of the blue.. just walked up to me an helped me!! I couldn't believe it.. I was just there, star struck and shocked that this was happening.. then I had a lunch with this chick and it went really well, really well, it was fun, really fun.. and great!!! I am the one w...

.. who really I was feeling was undermining me and generally making me feel bad about myself. I really wanted revenge, I calmed down about the whole thing! and now guess what?!! She is not going.. she has some other important thing to do!!! woo hoo!

... I to tell someone who came really early to do some work at home, and I was soo in the vortex that she accepted easily to my request!! Also some the boss agreed for me to spend an extra night at a nice hotel.  This also means that I don't have to do that thing of waking up way too early... :-)

... of old..  you know... Guess, what I am viewing reasonably priced options!! This trip totally made it possible. I remember many times, I would stress, and if and when I could forget, it would go away, and even exzema is going down, I finally got the money... when I relaxed about all things.. and also I learnt  many things that otherwise I would not know.. especially having to do with this training things, it is possible it is possible. It is actually possible. I can actually do this.. for a living, and even a good living!