... I talked to Jimmy and sort of made up after a fight and he decided to come see me yesterday evening... I was nervous and terrified... I am not sure why. I kept seeing signs that he was on his way.. you know , ten thousand 070s... everywhere I went... I decided to not give it to the terror and seriously soothe myself.... I did all in my power... what worked well... very well was the ABC game.. it worked really quite well, I tried looking for chapatis for the green grams.. but I couldn't find it with good reason... :-)... I got home, and the first thing I did was to meditate... 1st time in almost a year... and I felt calm.. .just then he shows up with a friend!!!! I got irritated... very irritated!! then I welcomed him and his friend and disappeared into the kitchen and started saying "thank you" and soothed and soothed, and imagined fun times, and a glass of wine.. things started looking up... and amazingly we had such a good time... really good time.. I made good rice, which was enough... I combined 2 left overs.. we laughed, really laughed, they ate the food... ended up eating too much... :-) shortly after they left to play pool... I was happy to remain at home and clean up.. and Jimmy said he would come back... I didn't really believe him... he came back in a 1.5 hours.. .from playing pool... it was all nice... very nice... also I was having a little hard time, keep up with the good thoughts and guess what I did, I played the ABC game with him as the subject... you know, I appreciate his nice body, his really beautiful, I managed to soothe me and slept well... in the morning... this morning... I managed to do something I have been wanting to do but never managing... getting to work really really early... today I was at 7.00am.... !! also I am very much looking forward to getting a chair that looks very much like this one... very very happy! and only 4 minutes to home time! :-) love you
... I talked to Jimmy and sort of made up after a fight and he decided to come see me yesterday evening... I was nervous and terrified... I am not sure why. I kept seeing signs that he was on his way.. you know , ten thousand 070s... everywhere I went... I decided to not give it to the terror and seriously soothe myself.... I did all in my power... what worked well... very well was the ABC game.. it worked really quite well, I tried looking for chapatis for the green grams.. but I couldn't find it with good reason... :-)... I got home, and the first thing I did was to meditate... 1st time in almost a year... and I felt calm.. .just then he shows up with a friend!!!! I got irritated... very irritated!! then I welcomed him and his friend and disappeared into the kitchen and started saying "thank you" and soothed and soothed, and imagined fun times, and a glass of wine.. things started looking up... and amazingly we had such a good time... really good time.. I made good rice, which was enough... I combined 2 left overs.. we laughed, really laughed, they ate the food... ended up eating too much... :-) shortly after they left to play pool... I was happy to remain at home and clean up.. and Jimmy said he would come back... I didn't really believe him... he came back in a 1.5 hours.. .from playing pool... it was all nice... very nice... also I was having a little hard time, keep up with the good thoughts and guess what I did, I played the ABC game with him as the subject... you know, I appreciate his nice body, his really beautiful, I managed to soothe me and slept well... in the morning... this morning... I managed to do something I have been wanting to do but never managing... getting to work really really early... today I was at 7.00am.... !! also I am very much looking forward to getting a chair that looks very much like this one... very very happy! and only 4 minutes to home time! :-) love you
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